Poetry

Everyone is booing,

Hi, how are you failing?

At everything you do.

Are you absolutely insane,

Why are you just constantly not doing your work?

When we see flaws in ourselves

we withdraw from society

curl in on ourselves

trying to hide from our insecurities.

The thing is

people struggle to understand

that their faults are a part of themselves

The first thing I ever understood about falling in love

is that it keeps you coming back

like magnets

whether it's good for you or bad for you

you're addicted.

And I didn't know the scope of it -

Headphones on, life off.

Turn up the sound 

to drown out

the deluge of my worries,

let the rhythm burn

my ears, ignore

the sting, because my

cheap blue headphones 

bring me

this happens too often:

attachment to that one friend;

a text—a hey—oh look,

i'm crying again.

you read it but you don't respond,

you play your games instead;

A site I was hesitant to join at first,
A place where people share their opinions, emotions,
And little pieces of their mind.

Yesterday

you looked in the mirror

said to yourself,

ugh

I look ugly

she's so ugly

ew

last week

you saw your reflection in the window

New year's resolutions.

I tell myself a lot of things every year -

I never listen.

No boys, no distractions.

Too late.

This time is different I think -

I want that senior solo

In biology,

we learn that there are so many tiny things

in the interior of our cells

nucleus/cytoplasm/mitochondria/ribosomes/golgi apparatus

floating.

My interior,

it holds my feelings

It's two weeks until Christmas

but it sure doesn't feel like it.

The air isn't filled

with the same spirit,

December joys are the

last thing on my mind.

My romanticized holiday season

Hands drawn to your eyes

Sobs wrenching themselves from your throat

Guttural noises that sound as if they clawed their way from your lungs

No. I don't want to love you.

I don't want to play songs that sound like you

until they become my whole head, I don't want

to write a poem 

if you ever call me laughing and cold