One of Those Girls

I can't shake the feeling

That I'll never be one of them

Girls with lives made of honey and laughter,

Girls with someone who looks at them

Like they're laced with something unknown and magical,

Girls who only have to reach out to feel

A hand warm in theirs.

Girls whose nights wind into long phone calls, growing

More sentimental as the minutes pass, who wake up

With someone their hearts pitter-patter 

At the thought of seeing.

Girls who are wanted,

Girls who are thought about

In the margins of someone's notebook, in their playlists,

In their dreams.

I want to have what I see in my friends,

in the hallways,

in books and movies and my own idle fantasies.

I want to be one of those girls,

The girls who have everything in the form of one person,

Because being them seems like flying,

Soaring over moments tinged by the love

Of someone else's laugh, their hands,

The way they lightly tease and banter.

These girls don't seem so different from me, so

Why does no one see me?
Why doesn't he see me, even when

His eyes lock with mine for a crazy delirious minute?

I want to be with him.

I want him to lace his fingers in mine, I want

him to call me "my girlfriend" with a shy smile, I want

to look at him and feel everything and nothing,

chaos and calm.

I want to be one of those girls, the girls I see everywhere,

Filling my vision until it blurs.

But I've just never been so lucky.