Thank you so much! This was kind of a reminder to myself of how things and people can change, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the story. Just a new chapter.
This is amazing! I love how it tells a story of an entire relationship, through the ups and downs, and how even once you've found the person you love, you might not stay together forever, but the love is still there in a different way - I also loved how you put breaking up as "a transition back to friendship". Very relatable and a unique way of turning such a strong story and relationship into poetry. I really enjoyed reading this! :)
OH MY GOD I LOVE THE BOOK THIEF!! i completely forgot i'd even read that until right this very second and it was such a good read - definitely the best thing my English teacher ever recommended to me lol. i absolutely adore how it's written from death's perspective and the differing places it jumps across. suuuuuch a good read :D
i agree with Geri! having to listen to everybody's fully unfiltered thoughts at once would be genuinely terrifying. especially like adults - i'd prefer to stick to my own head than have to hear some random republican/homophobic/other bad things guy's thoughts! but if i could control it, it'd be pretty cool
it's super good!! I like the word usage and the vivid emotion beneath the words. I have 2 things for you: maybe try replacing the comma after "far duller" with a period - it'd make the sentences flow nicer and sound less run-on. also, the "Dread" at the end could hit a bit harder if it was un-italicized and lowercase. just my opinions, it's your poem and it's already good, you don't need to change it if you don't want to!
Thank you <3
Oh my gosh, this sounds like it would be terrifying! I’m so glad that you’re okay and nothing happened. <3
Thank you so much! This was kind of a reminder to myself of how things and people can change, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the story. Just a new chapter.
This is amazing! I love how it tells a story of an entire relationship, through the ups and downs, and how even once you've found the person you love, you might not stay together forever, but the love is still there in a different way - I also loved how you put breaking up as "a transition back to friendship". Very relatable and a unique way of turning such a strong story and relationship into poetry. I really enjoyed reading this! :)
I love this. It’s beautifully written, and I love your choice of words. I don’t really have any critiques, but I really enjoyed reading this!
Yes Conan Gray! I love some of the bands you mentioned too but I love to see appreciation of my favorite artist lol. What's your favorite song of his?
Great work! Very powerful imagery. Keep writing!
OH MY GOD I LOVE THE BOOK THIEF!! i completely forgot i'd even read that until right this very second and it was such a good read - definitely the best thing my English teacher ever recommended to me lol. i absolutely adore how it's written from death's perspective and the differing places it jumps across. suuuuuch a good read :D
i agree with Geri! having to listen to everybody's fully unfiltered thoughts at once would be genuinely terrifying. especially like adults - i'd prefer to stick to my own head than have to hear some random republican/homophobic/other bad things guy's thoughts! but if i could control it, it'd be pretty cool
it's super good!! I like the word usage and the vivid emotion beneath the words. I have 2 things for you: maybe try replacing the comma after "far duller" with a period - it'd make the sentences flow nicer and sound less run-on. also, the "Dread" at the end could hit a bit harder if it was un-italicized and lowercase. just my opinions, it's your poem and it's already good, you don't need to change it if you don't want to!