Poetry

They say it will pass

They say I'll feel better 

"Time will fix it"

"Just put her pictures in a shredder"

But it's not that easy

To just "move on"

I don't think you ever really can

I rule a kingdom incompetent of content,

My brain may be the bearer of my walls,

The encapsulated fluency of marrow in this bone,

These rugged feet yearn strolling farther in the night;

I'm not responsible

And yet I have responsibilities

I'm not my siblings parent

And yet I am expected to parent them

I'm not that smart

And yet I must be right

I'm not mature

You and me have something only I can see,

I have realized it's slowly killing me.

I love you can't you tell?

you're the one that I fell for,

but when I did,

That ship has already sailed he told me,

like I didn't remember he didn't want me.

But I remember quiet clearly that I'm the one he doesn't love,

what hurts me is that I'm still in love with him.

I love you,

I lost you,

I have a really hard time moving beyond you.

But it's okay because you're happier without me,

and I still have our memories,

that should be enough to get me through eternity.

You push my feelings aside,

so they try to hide. 

But I already know you will see them,

my heart is full of mayhem.

Maybe it was my fault,

but the rejection on my heart was assault.

There's a young child sitting on the bench 
Her father sitting next to her 
And they're calm and it's peaceful 

In four years 
I will be grown 
I will no longer be a little kid 
Sitting in my father's truck 
A ford from 77 
That he sold that when I turned thirteen
Even though he promised it to me 

Here 
I will wait 
To see what will change 
And what will stay the same 
I wish I had stayed 
When it wasn't my choice 
So I left 
And you grew old 

Maybe this is a poem,

And maybe it's just words of love

Spilling endlessly from my thoughts,

Smudging into one on the page.

Today, in the present

Don't focus on the past

Don't think about the future

Focus on right now

Don't think about what happened yesterday or what you're doing tomorrow

Take a deep breath and focus on right now