QueenBee

Sack race

thirteenth birthday party

start of seventh grade.

My two BFFs since kindergarten,

the one that slipped in from fourth grade,

the two I met in fifth -

then of course my party girlfriends

How lucky am I?

To feel loved?

In a household and a family and a school that makes me feel not worth it

not good enough 

and I found someone outside of it all who loves me?

You get older

nothing gets easier.

Everything only gets worse.

I have mountains of expectations

over fourteen years of my life

it feels like so much

it's so little

I want to get you a gift

for Christmas

because

I want you to know that you're special to me.

And it really is that simple -

but I don't know what to get you

The age-old dilemma

something cute?

My band conductor has always said that 6/8 plays itself -

it does.

It's easy to just play through but not if you think too much.

I grew up in 6/8

my life plays itself

yes I make mistakes

The first thing I ever understood about falling in love

is that it keeps you coming back

like magnets

whether it's good for you or bad for you

you're addicted.

And I didn't know the scope of it -