Poetry

We all push ourselves for something

we push

          for achievement

          for recognition

          for forgiveness

i don’t seem to write much anymore.

Maybe it's because at one point the music got turned up real loud,

didn’t like the thoughts in my head,

the noise of the world. 

When I was little,

the window was a battlefield of light,

streetlights turned into stars,

and the world moved fast enough

for a hero to keep up with me.

He ran beside the car,

Being a teenager means 

Schrodinger's cat isn't just a concept anymore 

The person you are 

is simultaneously alive and dead 

i've had 

29

crushes.

the problem is

almost

none

were

reciprocated. 

recently

i've developed

another

on one of my

friends,

forbidden.

to her

When did skipping meals become a right of passage? 

A secret society of sickness so many seek to squeeze into, 

But really, not squeeze, rather slip.

Everybody hates mirrors.

Anything reflective.

Anything that shows you who you are -

we will never be enough to appease ourselves.

I miss when I could go into a public restroom

and wash my hands

Universal languages are -

something you understand without speaking.

How you connect with people of

different.

Cultures, places, traditions.

How you love people who are not the same as you.

Still up.

I feel the weight

That the dark puts on me.

I try to drown it with lamp light:

Gets worse.

I've been thinking, 

that my littlest brother- 

is just an illusion created by my mind. 

And it's because 

I don't get how somebody, 

like him, 

so sweet, 

You,

my mirror,

my other half,

my dark side.

We look the same.

But in no way are we alike.

We're like two halves, 

of the same coin.

But you-

are my worst regret.

Watching 

the flat white clouds 

melt onto the field. The  

subdued earth suffocates—my breath

quickens.