QueenBee

I'm sorry

I won't say why

because we both know

and we're both handling it differently

but I'm here

I'll be here for a very long time

so if you need me

just tell me

okay?

I'm here for you.

I fell

The ground didn't catch me, though

and I'm still falling

suffocating in my own sadness and grief

in shared sadness and grief, actually

except that it hit you harder

because you were closer to her

I didn't even realize how old she was

and she's not even my cat

and I didn't know her all that well

but I'm still crying

because she's not going to be there anymore

You were there.

You were always there.

You were there for me

When I couldn't be there

For myself.

You took care of me.

You came running and jumping onto my bed

When I cried -

and they're all breathless 

telling me of the doctors who defied odds and 

the athletes who destroyed records and 

the CEOs and chefs and 

and what if, 

yes I think they're cool and 

I'll make it look easy

I'll hold my head high

And move on

By that I mean

I'll see how hard it is

Shut my eyes tight

And dwell on the past in my mind

I have to set the pace